Nine Lives Has the Black Cat!

This Black Cat issue wasn’t as good. The banter between the Cat and Spider-Man seemed more forced, and the story wasn’t really as interesting. The bits of the issue that were good were that Spidey broke his arm and that the Burglar convinced Aunt May’s nursing home to (falsely) inform Pete that Aunt May had died.

Rating:

Never Let the Black Cat Cross Your Path!

Alright, the Black Cat! This should be good, right? Right! This was a fun issue and the interplay between the Black Cat and Spidey was well-done. I’m really looking forward to more of Ms. Hardy.

Rating:

The Wings of the Fearsome Fly!

Well, this issue starts off with snow, which is quite surprising. What the hell month is it supposed to be? I suppose it’s probably near the end of summer at this point, since Peter has finished his summer school. So perhaps this is just a freak August / early September snowstorm?

Everything goes wrong for Pete in this issue: in addition to the snow, this issue starts with Peter wondering if JJJ looked under his Spidey mask (I assumed he hadn’t, but maybe I’m wrong). When Pete enters the Bugle, the first thing Jameson does is fire him. Even Robbie’s pissed at Pete. Later, Spidey gets beat the hell up by the Fly and MJ finally calls it quits with Pete after he blew the date the night before. When Peter turns to Betty for comfort, in prances Ned Leeds to belt him one!

All this makes Spidey go nuts, leading to the craziest panel in awhile:

To top everything off, The Fly is captured by the cops and S.H.I.E.L.D., and Spidey doesn’t even get to vent his rage on the dude.

This issue ends with one hell of a bombshell — the burglar that killed Uncle Ben is back!

Great issue!

Rating:

The Battle of the Century!

Here’s why I am considering this story canon:

1. Wikipedia says the whole Marvel/DC thing with the brothers starts because they become aware of each other due to previous crossovers. This is a previous crossover, meaning it has some bearing on that event and can be considered to have happened in some form.
2. Uatu makes reference to this crossover in What If? v1 #1, saying “and, doubts exist as to whether Spider-Man’s spectacular bout with a certain colorfully-clad alien took place in this time continuum or another”, which I think allows lots of wiggle room.
3. Access (Axel Asher) can solve any results from this because he can time travel and he loves fixing universes. Just because we haven’t seen the merged universes get repaired, doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.

Is my placement right? I think it could be. We’re at a fairly large break in terms of the story in Amazing, and this book is explicitly set in the winter. I think it all works. Betty Brant and Ned Leeds are at the World News Conference, but this may be a small business trip away from Paris, or it could be a result of the crazy world-merging. I think I’m good for placement.

The story is split into three prologues (one for Superman, one for Spider-Man, and one for Luthor and Doc Ock), then four chapters of main story, and an epilogue.

This issue is f-ing badass. The art is fantastic! Doc Ock has a really sweet “flying octopus” ship, MJ & Lois go to outer space, Superman uses a sonic wave to counteract a tsunami. Ugh, this thing just rocks the whole way through.

Rating:

On a Clear Day, You Can See…The Mirage!

Betty and Ned finally get married, but things obviously can’t go totally smoothly for friends of Peter Parker. Their wedding is interrupted by a new villain named Mirage, who was little more than a thief with some fancy toys. It’s kind of a shame that such a big event was marred by such a lame crook.

We also find out the identity of the “Bowery derelict” that’s been popping up lately – none other than a still-living Dr. Octopus! Well, that certainly didn’t take long. I’m am very, very curious how this bozo survived being at ground zero of a nuclear explosion.

Rating:

The Longest Hundred Yards!

Spidey mentions in this issue that MJ isn’t talking to him because of that party he skipped out on the Shocker. I’m guessing she’s also mad at him at the end of this issue. This means that Iron Fist 8 (and presumably Deadly Hands of Kung-Fu 21) are in the wrong spot, since the Iron Fist issue shows Pete and MJ on a date. Or, this issue (and the next?) is in the wrong spot… I guess the point is just that those issues have to come after this one or before 151 and 152. Ugh.

Anyway, I’m not into football and this issue seemed really trite and stupid. Very forgettable.

Rating:

The Double, Part Four: The Burial

This story shows the clone’s realization that he is, in fact, a clone.

The biggest problem with the story is that it contradicts a scene in Amazing 151 where Spidey dumps the clone’s body into the incinerator. Here, the clone wakes up outside the incinerating plant. Also not explained is how Peter Parker could have thought his clone was dead and not realized he was simply unconscious.

There’s also this weirdness where the exact same panel is repeated:

This was good, and I probably would have given it 4.5 if it weren’t for the problems mentioned above.

A word on placement: I think I should have probably read this after Amazing 150, it would have made more sense there.

Rating:

Skirmish Beneath the Streets!

Looks like the new Amazing writer might actually be Len Wein. He has experience, but I didn’t really dig his work on Marvel Team-Up. Then again, Team-Up just kinda sucks no matter what, so hopefully Wein does better here.

…and he does. This was a pretty decent story, touching on the clone stuff, Ned and Betty’s engagement, the surprise (to me and the gang) return of Harry Osborn, as well as the beginning of a confrontation with the Shocker. Not the most riveting issue, but definitely a decent read and a solid start for Wein.

Note: I’m thinking the incinerator scenes all take place before that Team-Up stuff I just read.

Rating:

Even if I Live, I Die!

A really great finish (?) to this first clone saga! Woo. I know people really hate on the other one, but I never hear many comments about this. I’m quite happy to say that I totally enjoyed this arc and this ending.

A Spidey clone was an unexpected surprise! Is the surviving Spidey the original or the clone? Is there a difference really? Ah, sweet.

(We actually all know the answer to this, I assume, but I’ll just suspend that for now…)

Rating:

Jackal, Jackal…Who’s Got the Jackal?

Another great Tarantula / Jackal / clone-Gwen issue. In this one the identity of the Jackal is revealed as Professor Warren, which is great. I mean, I already knew all about it, so it wasn’t a surprise, but I really loved the way it was handled.

It’s funny how I used to hate Gerry Conway so much, but I think he’s really grown into his role in Amazing Spider-Man. His good stories are really good.

This happens to me a lot:

Rating:

The Tarantula is a Very Deadly Beast!

I’m sick, so not much of a review here.

• Pete finds out clone-Gwen is a clone: so good
• Tarantula and Jackal: so good
• Spidey going nuts and smashing a mirror: so good
• “Spider-Hombre”: so good
• the whole thing: so good

Rating:

Gwen Stacy is Alive…And, Well…?!

This issue picks up where Amazing 144 left off; remember that Marvel Team-Up 33 happens in the middle of this issue (somewhere on page 17, to be specific).

So Gwen Stacy is back, and we’re full on into the first clone storyline. Pete totally flies off the handle, and accuses clone-Gwen of being an impostor. It’s a great scene. At the end, Pete finds out that, a) clone-Gwen’s fingerprints match dead Gwen’s fingerprints, and b) dead Gwen is still in her grave.

The Scorpion stuff in this issue is really boring and crappy, but the Gwen story is great.

Rating:

Dead Man’s Bluff!

The art in this issue is pretty good, except that Aunt May looks like an insanely creepy reanimated corpse:

In this issue Ned and Betty drop the bomb that they’ve set the date for the wedding…but I thought they already got married. Am I nuts? Perhaps. Speaking of nuts, Pete certainly seems to be losing it in this issue. Gerry, Ross, et. al. do a good job of showing him becoming more and more unhinged. Eventually it is revealed that JJJ is behind it (along with a brand new Mysterio).

The most interesting part is when Pete thinks he sees Gwen. Could this be the first hint of the Jackal’s Gwen-cloning operation?

Rating:

The Man’s Name Appears To Be…Mysterio!

The Spider-Mobile is back! Sweet! Unfortunately, it also goes headfirst into the drink, and I suspect that’s the last we’ll be seeing of it.

This issue was alright, but a bit slow. Spidey runs into Mysterio and ends up getting duped into beating himself up. In the end, Ned Leeds informs us that Mysterio died in prison, causing Spidey to question whether he’s beginning to crack up. Jameson seems to be involved somehow. Fairly entertaining, I guess, and it had a nice brisk pace.

The best part is when Spidey steals McDonald’s from some guy:

Rating:

…And One Will Fall!

Meh, this issue had too much Grizzly, not enough Jackal. Let’s get some fucking momentum on this Jackal story already.

Also, I can’t help but wonder if the “tea” comment from Pete’s new neighbour was a sly marijuana reference. I will assume it was.

Rating:

The Molten Man Breaks Out!

Wow, Liz Allen is the Molten Man’s step-brother! That’s kinda crazy. Wanting to help Liz, Spider-Man basically tricks the Molten Man into killing himself. What a friend! Yet another character’s death!

Rating:

The Master Plan of the Molten Man!

The Molten Man hasn’t been seen for almost 100 issues of Amazing Spider-Man, but now he’s back! And Liz Allen! :O

Conway’s back to intrusive narration. He also slips up and has Robbie refer to Pete as free-lance, when at this point he’s actually on the payroll.

The Liz Allen thing gets dropped pretty early to focus on Molten Man, which is pretty typical stuff. I would have liked the focus to be more on her mysterious reemergence and less on his, but maybe that’ll happen next issue.

Rating:

Betrayed!

Spider-Mobile is finally done, and it’s a beaut! The best part about it is that Spider-Man doesn’t even know how to drive!

Ok, so there’s stuff going on here between the Jackal and Hammerhead, but then Doc Ock also makes an appearance. And what does he let slip? That Rimbaud, the mysterious man in Montreal from Amazing 120, knew something of Ock’s master plan. Very interesting! But, what did he want with May Parker?! Well, we find out with a fantastic cliffhanger– Doc Ock marries Aunt May! Crazy! (Although, I’m still not sure how Rimbaud fit in.)

Great issue! Conway, I think, is finally getting into the swing of things (ugh, sorry).

Rating:

The Dark Wings of Death!

The Vulture Hangs High!
Scripter: Gerry Conway
Artist: Ross Andru
Inkers: F. Giacoia, D. Hunt
Letterer: J. Costanza
Colorist: M. Brand
Originally published: January 1974

Fantastic issues. Stuff with Harry comes to a bit of a head, Spider-Man has to relive Gwen’s death when the Vulture drops MJ from the sky, there’s a brand new Vulture, and the Spider Mobile nears completion. These were a really good read. The mystery was pretty well done, and it had me going the whole time. Woot.

Rating:

The Last Battle!

Hammerhead and his men bust into the house to fight Doc Ock, who runs into a secured control room. Eventually they get in there too, so Ock fights a bit and then runs off again.

Elsewhere in the house, Aunt May has knocked out Spider-Man but he is starting to come to. It’s bullshit that his spider sense didn’t warn him of Aunt May’s attack, and it’s bullshit that an elderly woman with a vase could knock him out. When he wakes up he needs to hold on to some curtains for support and says that his skull feels like it had a run-in with a Mack truck or a bulldozer. Really? From a vase wielded by an old lady? Come on, man.

Meanwhile, Gwen Stacy and Robbie Robertson are trying to track down Peter. Thanks to a tip from Ned Leeds, they head off towards the Westchester mansion where all the action is.

Back at the house, Spidey tangles with Hammerhead. That guy has apparently stolen something important from Dr. Octopus’s control room, but he takes off before we find out what. A headbutt from Hammerhead has apparently “snapped [Spidey's] stomach-muscles” (WTF?) and aggravated his ulcer, so now Petey is in some pain.

This pain miraculously self-heals long enough for Spider-Man to fight Dr. Octopus who, we discover, is in love with Aunt May. Although Spider-Man is able to beat the crap out of Ock, May pulls a gun on him before he can finish things off. Startled by a police siren, May actually fires at her nephew. Fortunately her aim is off and Spider-Man is given a chance to escape.

The cops haul away all the baddies. As Octopus is being taken away in cuffs he asks May Parker to stay and look after the house for him. She accepts, and tells Pete and the gang that she won’t be returning to the city with them.

I still hate Gerry Conway. Why can he not handle simple things like maintaining continuity and consistent characterization? Do snapped muscles – something that sounds quite serious – really just feel better because you will them to? Would Aunt May really pull a gun on anyone, even Spider-Man? Would a conscious Doctor Octopus really agree to be lead away by the cops, while his mechanical arms were only a short distance away? So many plot holes and unbelievable developments – coupled with Conway’s infuriating narration – basically make this story impossible to enjoy. Unless you’re stupid.

Romita’s art is great as usual, so that also makes it slightly more tolerable.

Rating:

They Call the Doctor…Octopus!

Doc Ock is back and this issue starts out with a big fight, during which Spidey is unmasked. Luckily, through some quick thinking, he’s able to temporarily blind Ock with some webbing. This gives him enough time to escape with his secret intact. Soon after this close call, though, Pete begins suffering from incredible stomach cramps. He chalks it up to not taking care of himself – constant worry, lack of sleep and food – and heads home to rest it off. Harry and Gwen get Doc Bromwell over, and he diagnoses Peter with nervous exhaustion and an ulcer. The poor kid.

Interesting note on the art – I’m pretty sure that nobody’s ever had nipples in Spidey comics before now. But there they are when Pete takes his shirt off for the doctor, clearly visible. Woot. He doesn’t seem to have a belly button, though.

Octopus’s plan is kind of mysterious, but it somehow involves a ‘Mister H’. This Mister H seems to be some kind of crime boss, and he’s preparing a trap for Octopus. Doc Ock figures it out, though, and shows up fighting. We don’t really see in detail how it turns out, but Dr. Octopus comes out on top.

Later, Ned Leeds gets a lead on where Aunt May might be, so Peter heads off to find her. As Spider-Man, which makes no sense. He even has to steal a new mask from a costume shop, because his got lost in the fight and picked up by Randy Robertson. On his way to find Aunt May Spidey runs into Ock again and they fight some more. Spider-Man is pretty weak, but he manages to find and strap himself into some kind of strength-augmenting harness that Octopus had one of his hoods using. With this new-found advantage Spidey is able to beat Ock. Oh, but what’s this? The harness had actually run out of power! Spider-Man did it all on its own! Oh my gosh how nice! WHAT. THE. EFF. That’s the lamest. Why even include the damn harness in the story then? Ugh I hate trite garbage like that.

After the fight with Doctor Octopus, Mister H shows up. He is Hammerhead, and seems to just want to run the crime in the city. Or something.

The writing in this had some potential, but it Conway kept ruining any momentum he had going. The Mister H stuff with Doc Ock was pretty interesting, and I was digging the mystery, but that got abandoned fairly quickly. Conway focused on Spider-Man’s troubles – his health, his Aunt May, his issues with Doc Ock – even though these were far less interesting than the Hammerhead/Doctor Octopus back story. The writing was also marred by Conway’s hamfisted, melodramatic, over-the-top narration. Thankfully this didn’t appear often, but it was still far more often than I’d like. Then there was that bullshit with the harness…

I would like to give this issue a good rating, but the problems were just too much for me.

Rating:

Out of the Blue (Into the Fire)

Broken!
Writer: Eric Stephenson
Penciler: Keith Giffen
Inks: Andy Smith, Jimmy Palmiotti, Scott Elmer, Rodney Ramos
Originally published: May 1999

With Everything to Lose
Writer: Eric Stephenson
Artist: Andy Smith
Originally published: June 1999

The notes on the first issue say that this occurs right after Silver Surfer Vol. 1 #18, which I didn’t read. The issues makes reference to the fight with the Silver Surfer in issue 14, too, and Spidey says it happened “a few weeks back”. I’m going to have to rethink this ordering a bit.

The art in this is pretty dark and sort of weird looking. It reminds me of Batman a little, at least at the beginning. I dunno, it’s not bad, but it’s not my thing.

The first issue concerns the Silver Surfer going ballistic and attacking the city. It turns out he’s under the control of some weirdo named the Psycho Man “from the microverse of Sub-Atomica”. I was going to review/summarize all these, but they’re just bad. Really bad. I can’t bring myself to do it.

Rating:

The Speedster and the Spider!

Basically everything turns around here for Spidey: Jameson recovers (from shock, not actually a heart attack), he gives to tablet to Capt. Stacy, Pete’s pictures vindicate Spidey and the protesting students. Everything’s fine.

Quicksilver shows up and is trying to get in good with the Avengers. QS thinks Spider-Man’s a crook and tries to capture him. It doesn’t really go anywhere.

Pretty boring story again, unfortunately.

Rating:

Crisis on the Campus!

Mission: Crush the Kingpin!
Script: Stan Lee
Storyboards: John Romita
Illustration: Jim Mooney
Letterer: Sam Rosen
Originally published: February 1969

Spider-Man Wanted!
Author: Stan Lee
Innovator: John Romita
Illustrator: Jim Mooney
Letterer: Sam Rosen
Originally published: March 1969

The Kingpin is after an ancient, mysterious clay tablet that nobody can read. This appeals to both the linguist and wannabe-archaeologist in me.

Kingpin’s right-hand-man here is named Wilson, which is also the Kingpin’s name. It’s not important, but it’s weird. I guess Stan hadn’t figured out the Kingpin’s real name yet.

There’s a brouhaha on campus over the school’s decision to convert a student building into fancy private dorms for visiting alumni. The students are protesting but Parker acts like a dick and sides with the school administration. What a fuckin lamer. Later, he regrets it. Some guy named Josh calls Peter “whitey”:

The Kingpin uses the events on campus to steal the tablet. Spider-Man shows up. Kingpin beats Spider-Man, hurts Robbie’s son Randy, and gets the tablet.

Anna Watson refers to herself in the third person (actually, she just calls May “Anna” – dumber, but not as funny):

Next issue!

The Kingpin has the tablet and is laying in wait for Spider-Man. Spidey shows up, beats the Kingpin, gets the tablet. The Kingpin tells the cops that Spider-Man’s a bad guy and then they try to shoot Spidey. He vows to be a “menace” if that’s how they’re going to treat him.

Meanwhile, Gwen questions whether Peter might be a pussy.

We get the first mention of the Kingpin’s wife.

Next issue!

Bullet holes in Spider-Man’s shirt (from when the Kingpin’s men shot a dummy in the last issue) = nice continuity detail.

Apparently Spider-Man’s a crook now and he keeps the tablet. In addition to being a crook he is now also way more whiney than usual and spends a good deal of this issue complaining about all his bad luck.

The whole Gwen/cowardice thing leads to a fight. It’s uninteresting.

Um…the Kingpin breaks out of jail and then fights Spider-Man. When Spider-Man starts to kick his ass, Mrs. Kingpin shows up and drives him home.

In an interesting turn of events, Spider-Man threatens Jameson to the point of giving the old bastard a heart attack. As this issue ends, Jameson is basically dead. Will he recover? Probably.

OK, I’m done for now. These issues were kinda weak.

Rating:

The Madness of Mysterio!

To Squash a Spider!
Writer: Stan Lee
Artist: Johnny Romita
Embellisher: Jim Mooney
Lettered by: Artie Simek
Originally published: December 1968

Pete’s got problems as usual and even has to sell his bitchin motorcycle. Shitsville.

Plot:

• Mysterio shows up.
• Gwen and Peter finally get together.
• Norman Osborn has remembered that he’s the Green Goblin, but he still doesn’t remember that Peter is Spider-Man.

While fighting Mysterio, Spider-Man gets blown the hell up by some crazy-ass shrinking ray in a super-tight panel:

The issue ends after that, with Spider-Man apparently only six inches tall and trapped in a model amusement park.

The vast majority of the next issue just involves tiny Spider-Man fighting traps in Mysterio’s amusement park. Of course, the whole thing is an illusion and once Spider-Man figures it out he’s able to beat up Mysterio pretty handily. The resolution was actually far too quick and fairly unsatisfying unfortunately. There were no real explanations about how Mysterio pulled any of it off, except that he used “post-hypnotic suggestion”, which is a bit of a cop-out.

Also in the second issue, we’re introduced to Robbie Robertson’s son, Randy.

Rating: